Is an illicit material addiction a valid reason to file for divorce?

On Behalf of | Jan 15, 2024 | Divorce |

Pornography is so common online that even young adults can quickly and freely access it. Its popularity may make some people think that pornography is harmless. However, those married to someone seemingly obsessed with pornographic materials may feel quite differently.

Frustrated spouses sometimes question whether pornography is addictive and if their marriage is over because of the addiction that their spouse has developed. They may have asked their spouse to stop or limit their consumption of pornographic materials to no avail. Should these spouses keep fighting for their marriages or call it quits?

Can people actually become addicted to pornography?

There are two main components to an addiction. People often feel compelled to engage in certain behaviors and typically escalate their behavior over time. Frequent pornography use can meet both of those standards. Someone with a pornography addiction may desensitize themselves to straightforward and simple intimacy. They may need intense physical stimulation to enjoy intimacy with a partner after repeatedly self-pleasuring.

Pornography use also tends to escalate. People become desensitized not just physically but mentally and visually. They seek out increasingly intense, strange or violent pornography. They may then seek to act those videos out with a spouse. Others seek partners outside of their marriage to engage in sex acts that they do not feel comfortable requesting from a spouse.

Is pornography addiction a reason for divorce?

There is never any black-and-white answer about whether divorce is the right response to someone’s addiction. The severity of their dependency, their willingness to undergo treatments and the impact their addiction has had on their spouse can all influence whether reconciliation is possible or not.

Someone subjected to painful and humiliating sex acts or who discovered infidelity triggered by pornography consumption may decide that their happiest life involves obtaining a divorce. The unfortunate truth for pornography addiction and other addictions is that even though people can get treatment, many of them do not fully commit to it and only seek treatment to maintain the status quo.

If someone does decide to file for divorce based on someone’s pornography addiction, there is help and support available. From counseling services and possibly even support groups to legal advice to help someone obtain the best outcome in divorce proceedings, there are many resources that can take some of the pain and stress out of divorcing a pornography addict. Pursuing a brighter future may sometimes require divorce, but those secondarily affected by pornography addiction can heal from that experience.